Breastfeeding Basics for the New Mom (Updated 2021)

Breastfeeding.  Ocean-dwelling whales and dolphins breastfeed.  Dogs, cats, elephants, and rhinos breastfeed.  Even some mammals that don't give birth to live young breastfeed.  So breastfeeding your baby should be easy, right?  It’s “natural," right?!  

Natural....  Don’t get hung up on that word.  While most women’s bodies do produce milk, breastfeeding can feel anything but natural.  It can take a lot of trial and error and cause a lot of tears.  If breastfeeding makes you feel confused, frustrated, nervous or wholly inadequate, you are not alone.  But rest assured.  In most cases, it can become the beautiful, intimate miracle advertised.  Here are some breastfeeding basics to help with that.

First, don’t forget the most important thing: that your little one is properly nourished. There is a lot of pressure out there on moms to breastfeed, but there are reasons why breastfeeding may not be the best option for you or your little one.  One such reason is if your baby is not getting the nourishment he or she needs.  Forget the judgmental talking heads and ask your doctor about options if you notice the following: 

(1) baby continues to lose weight, doesn’t start gaining weight after five days, or starts losing weight after five days,
(2) baby is wetting fewer than six diapers in a 24-hour period, and/or has small dark stools, after five days of his or her birth,
(3) baby’s urine is dark (approximating the color of apple juice),
(4) baby is fussy or lethargic much of the time,
(5) baby’s eyes and/or mouth appear dry,
(6) baby doesn’t appear sated after eating,
(7) your breasts don’t feel softer after nursing, or
(8) you don’t hear or see baby swallowing. 

All that said, do not worry too much the first day or two.  It takes a bit of time for your body to replace the colostrum (a yellowish liquid rich in antibodies that boosts baby’s immune system and precedes breast milk) with breast milk.  Babies are born with some energy stores to see them through that time.  Plus their little tummies are only the size of a marble for the first couple days, so they don't need much.

If you decide to breastfeed, it helps to start as soon as possible. Breastfeeding right away helps with mother-child bonding and makes the experience for your baby more innate and less something to “learn.”  Attempting right away might also ensure you get any support/assistance you may need sooner.  If you give birth in a hospital, lactation consultants and nurses will likely be on hand to help you and baby ensure a proper latch (the connection of your baby’s mouth to your breast) and teach you the basics.  Doulas and midwives can do the same wherever you give birth.  Getting help early on can save you weeks of pain and misery.

An essential step to breastfeeding is latching.  Without a proper latch, it is harder for baby to feed and it can make breastfeeding painful.  Latching is all about positioning.  Think nipple to nose, belly to belly.  When babies’ stomachs are lying on or alongside their mother’s stomach, they don’t have to turn their heads to latch.  Point your nipple at baby’s nose, not the mouth.  This encourages babies to position their heads up, open their mouths wide, and latch on deeply (covering the nipple, most of the lower part of your areola and some of the upper part of the areola).   You may need to place your breast inside baby's mouth such that your nipple fills the roof of it.  Another tip: gently squeeze your breast so that some milk comes out, which will encourage baby to latch on and suckle.

Some experts encourage newly breastfeeding moms to nurse in a comfortably supported, semi-reclined position (around 45 degrees).  Gravity helps support baby so you don’t have to do all the work.  This also makes it easier for baby to use hands, position his or her head, and bury his or her chin into the breast.  Some say babies nurse better when their feet are touching something, which helps them feel secure.  Pushing baby’s head down toward your breast may trigger a baby’s resistance, which can cause baby to painfully chomp down.  Instead, try placing your hand at the nape of baby’s neck and bring him or her swiftly to your breast.  There is definitely more than one way to hold your baby while you nurse. For some inspiration, complete with pictures and videos, click here

Alternate breasts during the same feeding. This helps alleviate your own breast discomfort (full breasts can be painful!), ensures baby gets enough to eat, and helps with milk supply.  Moving the baby as you switch breasts (and tickling his or her little feet or chin) helps keep baby awake and eating during feeding time.  This ensure your baby gets more to eat and it gives you more time between feedings.  An appreciated bonus in the middle of the night!

Another breastfeeding basic is breast care.  Pay attention to how your nipple looks when your baby detaches.  If it is compressed, cracked, or bleeding, something is amiss.  The same is true if you feel a lot of pain.  If nursing causes you pain or your gut is telling you something isn’t right, check in with your doctor.  Additionally, several organizations can assist you.  La Leche League, dedicated to providing support and information to breastfeeding mothers, is a great option.

Also, be on the lookout for blocked ducts or mastitis.  Your breast may feel tender and/or hard.  There may or may not be redness or a hard spot or sore lump on your breast.  These are signs that a milk duct may be blocked.  Treat blockage engorgement promptly with these methods.

If you are breastfeeding, stay hydrated and well-nourished.  Remember, what you put in your body will usually also go into your breastfed child’s.  Avoid drinking alcohol and using drugs except as prescribed by your doctor who knows you are breastfeeding.  For ideas about how to best nourish you both, click here

Unless baby is not getting enough nutrition from breastfeeding, try to avoid formula and bottles at first. Using formula may keep your milk supply from sufficiently developing. 

And the bottle.  Ouch.  A hard one.  Breastfeeding moms deserve a break.  They deserve sleep!  And partners deserve a chance to nurture baby, too.  However, while most babies are ultimately able to transition between bottle and breast without issue, the introduction of bottles before a baby has mastered the art of breastfeeding may make mastering breast or bottle harder. 

For similar reasons, some experts suggest you avoid pacifiers at first, too.  While pacifiers can comfort a child, they sometimes suppress hunger cues.

With regard to frequency and duration, newborns should nurse 8-12 times per day for the first month.  By 1-2 months of age, babies nurse between 7 – 9 times a day.  It is generally advised to feed a newborn whenever they are hungry (every 1 ½ -3 hours), going no more than four hours between feedings.  Breastfed babies often eat more frequently than formula-fed babies.  Babies digest breast milk more easily than formula, so breast milk moves through baby’s digestive track faster than formula, making them hungry sooner.  Some babies hit it hard and hungry, finishing quickly.  Others, like my son, savor each drop, turning each feeding into a 45-60 minute love affair with food. 

Although breastfeeding offers tremendous health benefits and rewards, when one stops breastfeeding is often a question of personal preference, means, access, and culture.  The World Health Organization recommends exclusive breastfeeding (i.e. no other fluids or solids) for six months and then continued breastfeeding combined with solid foods for 2 years or as long as mother and baby desire.    

Lastly, there is the question of special supplies and clothing.  There is a vast market of nursing bras, nursing pads, milk catchers, clothing designed for easy nursing, nipple ointments, herbs, teas, and foods to help with milk supply, and countless other items to assist with breastfeeding and breast comfort.  All for a wide range of cost.  Do not be shy about researching anything that may make breastfeeding easier for you.  Ask your doctors, doulas, midwives, lactation consultants, parent-friends and parent-networks about what they recommend and do not recommend.  If breastfeeding is something you want to do, there is no reason why you shouldn't make it is comfortable as you can.  

Breastfeeding, for me, was beautiful beyond words.   That I could provide this gift for my son still fills me with joy.  But there were times I worried he would not get enough to eat, that I wasn't producing enough milk.  There were times my breasts felt like they were going to explode.  There were times when it wasn't convenient.  Heck, there were times when I just wanted to drink an adult beverage and not worry about it.  While breastfeeding is not for everyone, if it is something you want to do, I hope that these tips help make breastfeeding a little easier.  No matter what, enjoy this time - however you nourish your little one!

PS  For more great tips, check out this article on



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